MY OWN PERSONAL SUPERMAN

It is my sincere hope that this post doesn’t turn into a somber reflection, but the nature of regret often leads to moments of sadness and dwelling on “what could have been”. I ask for forgiveness in advance if I become too sentimental while sharing a moment when I wished I had acted differently.

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I was your typical 17-year-old, the youngest of seven siblings. That morning in August of 1981, within just a few short hours, I chose inaction that I still regret more than 40 years later.

Have you ever had someone in your life that you honestly felt was indestructible and would always be there for you for years to come? That was how I felt about my own father, like every child, my dad was Superman disguised in everyday life as Clark Kent.

As a follower of my Moteventure blog, you may already be aware of my previous writings on the profound impact of my father’s untimely passing. This pivotal event has significantly shaped both my personal development and the course of my life.

As a teenager, I took on several jobs to save money for college and have some spending money of my own. These included working with Northrup King in the summers, being a grocery bag boy at the B&W downtown (where I had my infamous moped traffic stop) and working at Harrison’s dime store across from the courthouse. These experiences taught me valuable skills and helped me build a bright future.

In early August, I was working at the dime store during our town’s “Ridiculous Days” event, a Saturday tradition where all the businesses on Main Street set up tables outside their stores. They’d display products to lure folks in or just get rid of slow-selling stuff at super low prices.

Once the day came to a close, I returned home, had dinner, and watched some TV, with nothing to set this Saturday night apart from the countless others I had spent with my family over the years. Little did I realize that within the next twelve hours, one of the pillars of my life would no longer be present for me, except in memories. (Do I sound like the elderly lady in “Titanic,” or what?)

My father arrived home later than usual that evening. He paused in the kitchen to stow away a carton of generic vanilla ice cream – quite the rage back then – before settling into the family room for some well-deserved relaxation. Meanwhile, my brother and I were downstairs, engrossed in a game of pool or Ping-Pong (also popular at the time). Eventually, we ascended the stairs to join our parents for a while, exchanged affectionate words and good nights, and then headed to our respective rooms for the night.

“Goodnight Dad, love you.” Those were the last words I said to him before he died.

The next morning, I was awoken by my older sister as I lay soundly asleep in my summer bedroom in our basement. My grogginess quickly faded as she informed me that our dad had been taken away in an ambulance. Despite my initial drowsiness, I was filled with the belief that he was just like “Superman” and would pull through. As exhaustion overcame me, my eyelids grew heavy, and I drifted back to sleep.

Several hours later, I struggled up the stairs only to discover that he had passed away during the surgical attempt to implant a pacemaker in his chest.

Although my previous words were adequate, they were not spoken while my father was fighting for his life. They were not words that offered closure all these years later. I am aware that he knew how much I loved him, but I wish I had been mature enough to treat the situation with gravity and have the chance to truly bid him farewell.

I carry a certain level of remorse for not realizing that people are not infallible, and that my own personal Superman was remarkable, but ultimately, just a mortal man.

NOW IT’S YOUR TURN

Sometimes we may reflect on missed opportunities and wish we had taken specific actions. However, it’s never too late to learn from these experiences and approach similar situations with newfound wisdom. Share with us in the comments what you would do differently, armed with the knowledge you have now!